O my God, You know that as a kid, I got fed up with my life. I threatened to join the circus — but Mom refused to drive me. Now I realize that with my lack of talent, I’d still be head shoveler for the elephants. OMG, thank You that Mom said no.
O my God, You know I hate telemarketer pitches about the joys of Medicare supplements or trips I’ve won to Bongo Bongo. I answered the latest “How are you, ma’am?” with an icy “I’m busy.” She hung up on me! But OMG, maybe now I know how telemarketers feel?
O my God, gardeners often expel these wild-child lilies in favor of civilized ones. Even now, gangs of these gaudy, orange lilies are trying to turn my yard into a pasture. But Jesus, You loved the lilies of the field. OMG, would that be such a bad thing?
O my God, You know I often awaken on Mondays, programmed for an adolescent rant. But OMG, thanks for confusing my default gripe with a gorgeous morning!
Dad clowns with his 98-year-old sister and his niece.
O my God, You are the powerful Lord of the universe. Yet, OMG, You also are the Lord of laughter! Thank You for my 90-year-old earthly father who, with every phone call, every visit, never lets me–or anyone else–forget that.
O my God, when I encounter a construction zone, I often want to swear at other drivers. But You said to pray for my enemies. O-kay. OMG, please watch over these idiots — er, stray sheep — and everyone in their path.
O my God, thank You for my grandchildren, a sevenfold blessing I could never have imagined. Once, though, I told them I remember when the U.S. flag included only 48 stars 
— and OMG, one grandson asked if I knew Betsy Ross.
O my God, You designed me with neatnik DNA. You know I dared my sister to cross a line I’d drawn in our bedroom, lest she deface my perfect side with her clutter. I’m not sure what genetic catastrophe occurred in my makeup since then. OMG, do you think I should apologize?
O my God, thank You for the first campout of the season! Thank You for the kayaking. The biking. The hiking. But OMG, thank You for being home again, where the hike to the bathroom is just down the hall.
O my God, thank You that I can help my daughter with my grandsons. Thank You she teaches eager immigrants English. But at 5 a.m.?! OMG, to think that when she was a groggy teen, I had to feed her breakfast in the minivan!